Thursday, December 31, 2009
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Portraits of Love
There was a great news story about Portraits of Love, a program I volunteered for leading up to the holidays. I met such amazing people. It was heartbreaking to know these families would be separated for such long periods. And, of course, there's always this underlying dread that someone might not come home at all. It was an honor to be of some small service to those who serve us all to selflessly.
Sunday, December 27, 2009
Today's Newsings
See? They're like musings, but about things in the news. Yeah, still working on a name for these.
Nigerian held in act of terror on airliner. He promises that if officials assist in transfer of $47 million to U.S. account, they keep 70%.
Nations mark 2004 tsunami tragedy. Survivors urge legislators to ban insensitive use of the "wave" at sporting events.
Charlie Sheen charged with assault. As well as for having all the acting range of an end table.
Medicaid system leaks millions. Tee-hee, they said "leaks."
Schools' wage war on chocolate milk. So much more productive than wasting time on things like "educating."
Small plane lands on golf course. Confirmed: There are actual stories involving the word "golf" that don't include the word "Tiger."
Pilgrims killed in Baghdad bombing. You'd have thought those giant belt buckles would have provided some degree of protection.
Six million dollar payday for mortgage execs. In us terms, that's 500,000 tubes of Preparation H.
Nicholas Cage faces $36.7 million lawsuit. Moviegoing public apparently finally fed up with horrific toupees.
Pennsylvania pastor shoots son during fight. Apparently thought he could make him more holy.
Nigerian held in act of terror on airliner. He promises that if officials assist in transfer of $47 million to U.S. account, they keep 70%.
Nations mark 2004 tsunami tragedy. Survivors urge legislators to ban insensitive use of the "wave" at sporting events.
Charlie Sheen charged with assault. As well as for having all the acting range of an end table.
Medicaid system leaks millions. Tee-hee, they said "leaks."
Schools' wage war on chocolate milk. So much more productive than wasting time on things like "educating."
Small plane lands on golf course. Confirmed: There are actual stories involving the word "golf" that don't include the word "Tiger."
Pilgrims killed in Baghdad bombing. You'd have thought those giant belt buckles would have provided some degree of protection.
Six million dollar payday for mortgage execs. In us terms, that's 500,000 tubes of Preparation H.
Nicholas Cage faces $36.7 million lawsuit. Moviegoing public apparently finally fed up with horrific toupees.
Pennsylvania pastor shoots son during fight. Apparently thought he could make him more holy.
Friday, December 25, 2009
Today's Yanked-from-the-Headlines Musings
Dizzy Madoff treated for hypertension. Also suffering from associated ailment: Hyperdouchery.
Sportscaster George Michael dead at 70. Singer George Michael's career? Ditto.
Disabled gunman held after standoff. Oh, sure. Able-bodied criminals would get no mercy. This guy gets a hug.
Donkeys escape from live nativity scene in Colorado. Some kind of political statement about church and state, no doubt.
Man dies after skiing into tree at Colorado resort. "Life and limb" takes on a whole new meaning.
$500 million in sunken treasure returning to Spain. GNP increases by, oh, 500%.
Oldest captive gorilla turns 53 at Ohio zoo. Younger mate planned, but no flashy sportscar because, well, he's a gorilla.
Obamas arrive in Hawaii for vacation. Counting down minutes until poi is socialized.
Kiss frontman Gene Simmons accused of threats. New threats. The gonorrhea thing is old news.
Woman knocks down pope at mass. Funny, Catholic opposition to birth control usually results in people being knocked up.
Sportscaster George Michael dead at 70. Singer George Michael's career? Ditto.
Disabled gunman held after standoff. Oh, sure. Able-bodied criminals would get no mercy. This guy gets a hug.
Donkeys escape from live nativity scene in Colorado. Some kind of political statement about church and state, no doubt.
Man dies after skiing into tree at Colorado resort. "Life and limb" takes on a whole new meaning.
$500 million in sunken treasure returning to Spain. GNP increases by, oh, 500%.
Oldest captive gorilla turns 53 at Ohio zoo. Younger mate planned, but no flashy sportscar because, well, he's a gorilla.
Obamas arrive in Hawaii for vacation. Counting down minutes until poi is socialized.
Kiss frontman Gene Simmons accused of threats. New threats. The gonorrhea thing is old news.
Woman knocks down pope at mass. Funny, Catholic opposition to birth control usually results in people being knocked up.
Thursday, December 24, 2009
News: Yanked From the Headlines
Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins split. You might say Andy Dufresne finally got paroled.
Poll spells trouble for Lieberman. Spells it d-i-p-s-h-i-t.
Otters delay plane, get into bags. Customs dogs are federal employees, so they slept through the whole thing.
Lawmaker targets loud TV ads. Set to propose new legislation on SUNDAY, SUNDAY, SUNDAY!
Pranksters gift-wrap apartment. Grandmother of pranksters insists on saving bow.
Nestle shuts Zimbabwe factory. Charlie and Uncle Joe forced to get real jobs.
iPhone is 2009's top seller. Given spotty coverage, will be renamed "oyPhone" in 2010.
Nursing crisis about to get worse. Almost out of milk.
Winehouse charged with assault. And in other shocking news, moon not cheese.
Steven Tyler enters rehab. And in other shocking news, Winehouse charged with assault.
Hostages held in post office. Authorities later realize they're just in line. Same difference.
Three tigers escape from Mexican circus. Immediately proceed to Vegas to cheat on their wives.
Fugitive updates Facebook page while on run. Would have tweeted, but over capacity.
Embroiled Jackson doctor lands TV role. In a remake of "Gunsmoke" called "Smoking Gun."
"Sesame Street" star Alaina Reed-Amini dead at 63. Guests baffled by missing cookies at wake.
Study: Haitan children work as slaves. Apparently, children also serve as proofreaders at CNN.com.
Poll spells trouble for Lieberman. Spells it d-i-p-s-h-i-t.
Otters delay plane, get into bags. Customs dogs are federal employees, so they slept through the whole thing.
Lawmaker targets loud TV ads. Set to propose new legislation on SUNDAY, SUNDAY, SUNDAY!
Pranksters gift-wrap apartment. Grandmother of pranksters insists on saving bow.
Nestle shuts Zimbabwe factory. Charlie and Uncle Joe forced to get real jobs.
iPhone is 2009's top seller. Given spotty coverage, will be renamed "oyPhone" in 2010.
Nursing crisis about to get worse. Almost out of milk.
Winehouse charged with assault. And in other shocking news, moon not cheese.
Steven Tyler enters rehab. And in other shocking news, Winehouse charged with assault.
Hostages held in post office. Authorities later realize they're just in line. Same difference.
Three tigers escape from Mexican circus. Immediately proceed to Vegas to cheat on their wives.
Fugitive updates Facebook page while on run. Would have tweeted, but over capacity.
Embroiled Jackson doctor lands TV role. In a remake of "Gunsmoke" called "Smoking Gun."
"Sesame Street" star Alaina Reed-Amini dead at 63. Guests baffled by missing cookies at wake.
Study: Haitan children work as slaves. Apparently, children also serve as proofreaders at CNN.com.
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
My New Year's Resolutions for 2010
1. Get a career. Everyone else seems to have one.
2. Stop nagging people about how offensive the word "retard" is. They have bigger problems.
3. Get better at pretending to enjoy time with my nephews.
4. Spend less time on the computer. Oh, who am I kidding?
5. Help the homeless. And remind people how lucky they are not to be.
6. Judge less. Unless someone really deserves it. Which includes just about everybody, so nevermind.
7. Help my grandmother kick the bucket. It's what she wants more than anything.
8. Tell the truth. It seems so simple when it's on a list like this.
9. Eat vegetables. Or something equally unrealistic.
10. Less Tiger, more world peace.
2. Stop nagging people about how offensive the word "retard" is. They have bigger problems.
3. Get better at pretending to enjoy time with my nephews.
4. Spend less time on the computer. Oh, who am I kidding?
5. Help the homeless. And remind people how lucky they are not to be.
6. Judge less. Unless someone really deserves it. Which includes just about everybody, so nevermind.
7. Help my grandmother kick the bucket. It's what she wants more than anything.
8. Tell the truth. It seems so simple when it's on a list like this.
9. Eat vegetables. Or something equally unrealistic.
10. Less Tiger, more world peace.
Monday, December 21, 2009
Sunday, December 20, 2009
Now, This is Cool
I have a lot of fun shooting portraits of kids. Snapping shots that makes parents kind of cry a little, I love that.
My portrait sessions really picked up this holiday season. That word-of-mouth thing can be awesome. During the last week, my mailbox was overflowing with holiday cards, almost all of them from parents who used my photos on their cards this year.
It's an amazing feeling to be a part of people's lives, their holidays, in some way. Hopefully, they have a memory to last a lifetime.
It's pretty slick seeing all the ways my clients use their photos. Some do traditional cards, featuring one image or a collage of many images. Some get prints and insert them into their cards. Some print cards that are more like postcards. Some of these pieces are fairly elaborate.
No matter what format people use, I'm endlessly appreciative that they like my work enough to use my photos in their holiday mailings.
Happy holidays, by the way. I hope yours is picture perfect.
My portrait sessions really picked up this holiday season. That word-of-mouth thing can be awesome. During the last week, my mailbox was overflowing with holiday cards, almost all of them from parents who used my photos on their cards this year.
It's an amazing feeling to be a part of people's lives, their holidays, in some way. Hopefully, they have a memory to last a lifetime.
It's pretty slick seeing all the ways my clients use their photos. Some do traditional cards, featuring one image or a collage of many images. Some get prints and insert them into their cards. Some print cards that are more like postcards. Some of these pieces are fairly elaborate.
No matter what format people use, I'm endlessly appreciative that they like my work enough to use my photos in their holiday mailings.
Happy holidays, by the way. I hope yours is picture perfect.
Saturday, December 19, 2009
Pilfered From the Headlines
Karzai announces new Afghan cabinet. His mother announces plan to stick to traditional blankets from now on.
Pot found on Lil Wayne's tour bus. In other shocking news, water found in ocean.
Baby without a brain turns 1. Man without a brain turns 59 on Jan. 12, plans to thank "dittoheads" for his success.
700,000 Dayquil units recalled. NyQuil users comment, "Glaaaaugh, mavver narf!"
Navy finds bodies after ship sinks. One of whom is Raven, up on the main stage.
Train passengers stranded in Chunnel. Brits grit what's left of their teeth and bear it.
U.S. prosecution links drugs to terrorism. No, wait, that's Doritos. Links drugs to Doritos, sorry.
Obama hosts community banks at White House. Emplores reps to help pens to cast off their chains.
Poland leads search for stolen Auschwitz sign. After hearing it sat atop two poles, they figured they had a head start.
U.S. says nuclear agreement is near. Bush comes out of seclusion to add, "Lotta good that does. What about nucular weapons?"
Pot found on Lil Wayne's tour bus. In other shocking news, water found in ocean.
Baby without a brain turns 1. Man without a brain turns 59 on Jan. 12, plans to thank "dittoheads" for his success.
700,000 Dayquil units recalled. NyQuil users comment, "Glaaaaugh, mavver narf!"
Navy finds bodies after ship sinks. One of whom is Raven, up on the main stage.
Train passengers stranded in Chunnel. Brits grit what's left of their teeth and bear it.
U.S. prosecution links drugs to terrorism. No, wait, that's Doritos. Links drugs to Doritos, sorry.
Obama hosts community banks at White House. Emplores reps to help pens to cast off their chains.
Poland leads search for stolen Auschwitz sign. After hearing it sat atop two poles, they figured they had a head start.
U.S. says nuclear agreement is near. Bush comes out of seclusion to add, "Lotta good that does. What about nucular weapons?"
Thursday, December 17, 2009
Fifty Portraits and a Revelation
Tonight, I shot 50 portraits of 50 kids. They and their moms are all residents of a local women's shelter, catering to abused and homeless women and their children.
There are a lot of emotions swirling around after this adventure. Maybe the most powerful is that of gratitude. Feeling deeply thankful for the amazingly charmed life most of us lead.
I'm also feeling such a sense of bliss because of what I suspect is the power of contribution. I have no doubt that contribution is the single most important key to happiness and contentment in life. In 10 or 20 years, you will have no recollection of what you did at work today. But the emotions resulting from contribution, I suspect, we remember.
I'm also feeling appreciation for friendship. I had two photographer friends, Kim and Mark, show up to help in whatever way they could. Their friendship made me keenly aware of all my friendships. I am so lucky to have accumulated so many wonderful friends in my life.
I am feeling a sense of hope. Because while I can't imagine what these families have been through, I got a real sense of dignity and resilience from them. All of them.
I think I'm also feeling immense pride. Mostly because of this photo.
When this guy came into the room, it was obvious he was different. I learned he's autistic. I can't say I know much about autism, but the boy was a little distant. He didn't make eye contact, and didn't really respond at first. His mother mentioned that he'd never had a photo taken where he was smiling. Well, I had to put an end to that little streak.
There was such radiance in the smiles of those children, even in the face of adversity, some of which we can't even imagine.
Their mothers often couldn't hide traces of their personal pain. But the kids? They were just kids. Getting on with life.
I have another emotion I'm not entirely sure I can articulate. In volunteering to help these people tonight, strangers, I feel overcome with a euphoria that's hard to describe. While I feel utter exhaustion physically (50 portraits!), I also feel like I could run a marathon or climb a mountain.
In volunteering to help, to give these families keepsakes that will create a sense of place and pride and love, I happened upon a completely unexpected emotion. A sense of something I kind of thought was made up.
There's a very good chance I'm feeling the holiday spirit. A profound feeling of connection and joy and abundance I'm honestly not sure I thought was possible. And the question that comes to mind is why, on earth, wouldn't we want to feel this every single day of our lives?
So, yes, if this is the holiday spirit, I have it.
Just don't tell anyone. I have a reputation to maintain.
There are a lot of emotions swirling around after this adventure. Maybe the most powerful is that of gratitude. Feeling deeply thankful for the amazingly charmed life most of us lead.
I'm also feeling such a sense of bliss because of what I suspect is the power of contribution. I have no doubt that contribution is the single most important key to happiness and contentment in life. In 10 or 20 years, you will have no recollection of what you did at work today. But the emotions resulting from contribution, I suspect, we remember.
I'm also feeling appreciation for friendship. I had two photographer friends, Kim and Mark, show up to help in whatever way they could. Their friendship made me keenly aware of all my friendships. I am so lucky to have accumulated so many wonderful friends in my life.
I am feeling a sense of hope. Because while I can't imagine what these families have been through, I got a real sense of dignity and resilience from them. All of them.
I think I'm also feeling immense pride. Mostly because of this photo.
When this guy came into the room, it was obvious he was different. I learned he's autistic. I can't say I know much about autism, but the boy was a little distant. He didn't make eye contact, and didn't really respond at first. His mother mentioned that he'd never had a photo taken where he was smiling. Well, I had to put an end to that little streak.
There was such radiance in the smiles of those children, even in the face of adversity, some of which we can't even imagine.
Their mothers often couldn't hide traces of their personal pain. But the kids? They were just kids. Getting on with life.
I have another emotion I'm not entirely sure I can articulate. In volunteering to help these people tonight, strangers, I feel overcome with a euphoria that's hard to describe. While I feel utter exhaustion physically (50 portraits!), I also feel like I could run a marathon or climb a mountain.
In volunteering to help, to give these families keepsakes that will create a sense of place and pride and love, I happened upon a completely unexpected emotion. A sense of something I kind of thought was made up.
There's a very good chance I'm feeling the holiday spirit. A profound feeling of connection and joy and abundance I'm honestly not sure I thought was possible. And the question that comes to mind is why, on earth, wouldn't we want to feel this every single day of our lives?
So, yes, if this is the holiday spirit, I have it.
Just don't tell anyone. I have a reputation to maintain.
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Wrested From the Headlines
Today's torn-from-the-headlines musings. I'm not entirely sure what some of them mean, so don't say I didn't warn you.
Obama: On "precipice" of health overhaul. Me: Mr. President, 28% of the people who voted for you think "precipice" involves urine.
Student sent home from school for drawing a crucifix. The principal was cross.
Oral Roberts passed away. Tee-hee. They said, "Oral."
Tiger's sponsors feel his popularity sink. Stocks of bandwagon manufacturing companies at all-time highs.
Jennifer Garner's alleged stalker arrested. Her alleged acting ability rumored to be in hiding to avoid extradition.
H1N1 vaccine doses for kids recalled. Conspiracy theorists simultaneously throw out hips from mass jig dancing.
Iowa mom gets life for murdering son. Seems like it should be the other way around.
Chris Brown deletes his Twitter account. What will we all do with the extra brain cells we're likely to get back?
Five indicted in fatal beating of Latino man. All were blindfolded and holding sticks at the time of the crime.
Philippines volcano eruption imminent. Phillipines relevancy unlikely.
20,000 exotic animals seized. Two words: Viscosity breakdown.
Illinois to get Gitmo detainees. Thought they were being tortured before? Now they'll be bored to death.
Few banks serve Muslim needs. First it was outrageous overdraft fees. Now, a refusal to offer knife sharpening for beheadings.
Courtney Love loses custody. Of her mind.
One in six teens engage in "sexting." Three in six engage in praying desperately to last just 30 more seconds.
Comcast introduces a streaming TV service. Which is great, because the current options are more steaming than streaming.
Lil Wayne's delayed album released by accident. Dog blamed.
Obama: On "precipice" of health overhaul. Me: Mr. President, 28% of the people who voted for you think "precipice" involves urine.
Student sent home from school for drawing a crucifix. The principal was cross.
Oral Roberts passed away. Tee-hee. They said, "Oral."
Tiger's sponsors feel his popularity sink. Stocks of bandwagon manufacturing companies at all-time highs.
Jennifer Garner's alleged stalker arrested. Her alleged acting ability rumored to be in hiding to avoid extradition.
H1N1 vaccine doses for kids recalled. Conspiracy theorists simultaneously throw out hips from mass jig dancing.
Iowa mom gets life for murdering son. Seems like it should be the other way around.
Chris Brown deletes his Twitter account. What will we all do with the extra brain cells we're likely to get back?
Five indicted in fatal beating of Latino man. All were blindfolded and holding sticks at the time of the crime.
Philippines volcano eruption imminent. Phillipines relevancy unlikely.
20,000 exotic animals seized. Two words: Viscosity breakdown.
Illinois to get Gitmo detainees. Thought they were being tortured before? Now they'll be bored to death.
Few banks serve Muslim needs. First it was outrageous overdraft fees. Now, a refusal to offer knife sharpening for beheadings.
Courtney Love loses custody. Of her mind.
One in six teens engage in "sexting." Three in six engage in praying desperately to last just 30 more seconds.
Comcast introduces a streaming TV service. Which is great, because the current options are more steaming than streaming.
Lil Wayne's delayed album released by accident. Dog blamed.
Sunday, December 13, 2009
Facts about Dribbleglass.com Visitors
I don't really track how many people visit Dribbleglass.com anymore. I used to watch religiously, but I just can't muster the interest these days.
However, today, I came across a site that claims to say how many unique visitors a site gets. According to that site, Dribbleglass.com gets 2,695 unique visitors per day.
Then they give some interesting stats about what those visitors equate to. I thought these were fun:
What does 2,695 unique visitors per day mean to you?
1. They can fit in 10,780 sq ft. room.
2. Their weight of feces is 6,738 pounds per day (2,398,550 pounds per year).
3. They are waiting in a long line. The line distance is 1.53 miles.
4. They need to drink 1,348 gallons per day.
How far the Interwebs has come when it can tell you how many pounds of feces your site visitors generate. Yay, Interwebs!
However, today, I came across a site that claims to say how many unique visitors a site gets. According to that site, Dribbleglass.com gets 2,695 unique visitors per day.
Then they give some interesting stats about what those visitors equate to. I thought these were fun:
What does 2,695 unique visitors per day mean to you?
1. They can fit in 10,780 sq ft. room.
2. Their weight of feces is 6,738 pounds per day (2,398,550 pounds per year).
3. They are waiting in a long line. The line distance is 1.53 miles.
4. They need to drink 1,348 gallons per day.
How far the Interwebs has come when it can tell you how many pounds of feces your site visitors generate. Yay, Interwebs!
Saturday, December 12, 2009
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
If It's Torn From the Headlines...
If it's torn from the headlines, it only has to be 34% as funny!
Glaciologist spots huge iceberg off Australia. Apparently, Nicole Kidman lost her GPS.
Petraeus says Afghan war will be harder before it gets easier. Wars. Why do they have to be so hard, anyway?
Some concerned about how atheists cope with Xmas. Xmas is as much about religion as Tiger Woods coverage is about golf.
Pay hike fosters uptick in Afghan army recruits. Being Afghani just fosters ticks.
Smoking kills five million every year. Even worse, it annoys me.
Mounting research suggests germs may be good for you. Tee-hee. They said "mounting."
Historic EPA finding: Greenhouse gases harm humans. Other breaking news: Israelis, Palestinians not real fond of each other.
Poor nations angry over climate papers. Oh, yeah, and the starvation thing.
U.S. offers to pay Native Americans for lost funds. Response, "We'd prefer an apology for Costner's 'Dances With Wolves' acting."
College degrees more expensive, worth less in job market. Beer pong and casual sex apparently no longer in-demand skills.
Average American consumes 34GB worth of content a day. Just 4KB if you exclude the porn.
Glaciologist spots huge iceberg off Australia. Apparently, Nicole Kidman lost her GPS.
Petraeus says Afghan war will be harder before it gets easier. Wars. Why do they have to be so hard, anyway?
Some concerned about how atheists cope with Xmas. Xmas is as much about religion as Tiger Woods coverage is about golf.
Pay hike fosters uptick in Afghan army recruits. Being Afghani just fosters ticks.
Smoking kills five million every year. Even worse, it annoys me.
Mounting research suggests germs may be good for you. Tee-hee. They said "mounting."
Historic EPA finding: Greenhouse gases harm humans. Other breaking news: Israelis, Palestinians not real fond of each other.
Poor nations angry over climate papers. Oh, yeah, and the starvation thing.
U.S. offers to pay Native Americans for lost funds. Response, "We'd prefer an apology for Costner's 'Dances With Wolves' acting."
College degrees more expensive, worth less in job market. Beer pong and casual sex apparently no longer in-demand skills.
Average American consumes 34GB worth of content a day. Just 4KB if you exclude the porn.
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Another Outburst of Headline Malfeasance
Soy foods could help breast cancer survivors. Most surveyed prefer the cancer.
"Senate rejects tougher abortion rules." Couldn't we all just vote to retroactively abort Senators?
MSN reports, "Must get bin Laden to kill al-Qaida." I say we ask Waldo where he is.
Dow falls 104 on global worries. Just me, or does it take a rise or dip of 300 to get my attention these days?
Pair charged with extortion of Stamos. Isn't that a little like blackmailing a vagrant? Let's talk ROI.
Tiger Woods' mother-in-law hospitalized. First victim of SAS (Scandal Apathy Syndrome).
Pollution fears taint Sudan oil promise. Tee-hee. They said "taint."
Bryant Gumbel has lung cancer. Worst part: Even when you think it's gone, it comes back. Again and again.
Major storm moving toward Rocky Mountains. Adrian breaks out plastic bra. (That joke would have killed in 1976.)
CBS axes "As the World Turns" after 50 years on-air. Both viewers begin grieving process.
Internal TSA info. found on the Web. Loafers and keys deemed the next big threat to national security.
Religious groups active in climate debate. Because their whole "babies come from storks" insights have proved invaluable.
"Senate rejects tougher abortion rules." Couldn't we all just vote to retroactively abort Senators?
MSN reports, "Must get bin Laden to kill al-Qaida." I say we ask Waldo where he is.
Dow falls 104 on global worries. Just me, or does it take a rise or dip of 300 to get my attention these days?
Pair charged with extortion of Stamos. Isn't that a little like blackmailing a vagrant? Let's talk ROI.
Tiger Woods' mother-in-law hospitalized. First victim of SAS (Scandal Apathy Syndrome).
Pollution fears taint Sudan oil promise. Tee-hee. They said "taint."
Bryant Gumbel has lung cancer. Worst part: Even when you think it's gone, it comes back. Again and again.
Major storm moving toward Rocky Mountains. Adrian breaks out plastic bra. (That joke would have killed in 1976.)
CBS axes "As the World Turns" after 50 years on-air. Both viewers begin grieving process.
Internal TSA info. found on the Web. Loafers and keys deemed the next big threat to national security.
Religious groups active in climate debate. Because their whole "babies come from storks" insights have proved invaluable.
Friday, December 4, 2009
A Sudden Explosion
Out of nowhere, spurred on by the re-discovery of a long-lost comedic inspiration (Andy Borowitz), I had a sudden urge to write topical, Twitter-length jokes, torn from the headlines...
American Amanda Knox found guilty of murdering British roommate. Horrifying details included victim's dental records.
Scores killed in blast at Russian nightclub. Related story: Russian dancers blasted for killer lap dance prices at Scores.
Chris Brown says, "I've never had problems with anger." "Great, put it all on us," say knuckles.
Nicolas Cage wins U.N. award for humanitarian work. Apparently, keeping bill collectors busy is now "humanitarian work."
George Washington letter to nephew Bushrod Washington sells for $32 million. It begins, "Dear Bushrod. BUSH. ROD. Tee-hee."
Police were called to Brad and Angelina's L.A. home. Tasers, tactical shotguns ineffective at subduing Brad's beard.
White House OKs expanding CIA drones. Employee dining room at Langley converts to Vegas-style buffet.
Former WWE star Umaga, "The Samoan Bulldozer," dead at 36. First case of a tongue going IN upon someone's death.
New Delhi launches campaign to discourage public urination. Call to ask about it answered by articulate guy in Maine.
Apple reportedly buys Lala music service. Bid for Pee-Pee rebuffed.
American Amanda Knox found guilty of murdering British roommate. Horrifying details included victim's dental records.
Scores killed in blast at Russian nightclub. Related story: Russian dancers blasted for killer lap dance prices at Scores.
Chris Brown says, "I've never had problems with anger." "Great, put it all on us," say knuckles.
Nicolas Cage wins U.N. award for humanitarian work. Apparently, keeping bill collectors busy is now "humanitarian work."
George Washington letter to nephew Bushrod Washington sells for $32 million. It begins, "Dear Bushrod. BUSH. ROD. Tee-hee."
Police were called to Brad and Angelina's L.A. home. Tasers, tactical shotguns ineffective at subduing Brad's beard.
White House OKs expanding CIA drones. Employee dining room at Langley converts to Vegas-style buffet.
Former WWE star Umaga, "The Samoan Bulldozer," dead at 36. First case of a tongue going IN upon someone's death.
New Delhi launches campaign to discourage public urination. Call to ask about it answered by articulate guy in Maine.
Apple reportedly buys Lala music service. Bid for Pee-Pee rebuffed.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
