Soy foods could help breast cancer survivors. Most surveyed prefer the cancer.
"Senate rejects tougher abortion rules." Couldn't we all just vote to retroactively abort Senators?
MSN reports, "Must get bin Laden to kill al-Qaida." I say we ask Waldo where he is.
Dow falls 104 on global worries. Just me, or does it take a rise or dip of 300 to get my attention these days?
Pair charged with extortion of Stamos. Isn't that a little like blackmailing a vagrant? Let's talk ROI.
Tiger Woods' mother-in-law hospitalized. First victim of SAS (Scandal Apathy Syndrome).
Pollution fears taint Sudan oil promise. Tee-hee. They said "taint."
Bryant Gumbel has lung cancer. Worst part: Even when you think it's gone, it comes back. Again and again.
Major storm moving toward Rocky Mountains. Adrian breaks out plastic bra. (That joke would have killed in 1976.)
CBS axes "As the World Turns" after 50 years on-air. Both viewers begin grieving process.
Internal TSA info. found on the Web. Loafers and keys deemed the next big threat to national security.
Religious groups active in climate debate. Because their whole "babies come from storks" insights have proved invaluable.
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